Loss and Return
by TFAN Override-Dragon Light
Summary: When you lose someone you love, everything falls apart. But sometimes, those lost return. But they don't return the same, and some cannot accept that the lost have returned. Sometimes however, the lost are meant to stay lost.


Chapter 1: Loss

Raph couldn't breathe. Everything was so heavy; his shell, his heart, his head, and even the tears that slipped out of his green eyes as he stared at the scene before him. It had to be a dream! It had to!

 _But it wasn't_.

The red masked turtle could barely hear Mikey's sobs through the roaring in his ears. Through tear blurred eyes, he could make out Donnie sitting in the chair next to him. The purple masked turtle was hunched over, shaking slightly as he resisted the urge to cry.

And Leo…

The blue masked turtle held the once white head in his lap as he sat on the cot. The eldest turtle had a haunted look in his ocean blue eyes. Raph knew why.

 _ **"Leo!"**_

Raph remembered her scream. The scream that gave the only warning for what had happened next.

 _ **"EMMA!"**_

The blade had been heading for Leo, but she had pushed the katana wielding turtle out of the way.

 _SHRIK!_

The sound of metal tearing into flesh would forever haunt the aggressive teen's mind. Raphael Hamato would _never_ forget.

The death of their sister would forever haunt their family until their time came.

Raph remembered her scream of pain, as the double blades of the Shredder's gauntlet sliced into her side. The hot-headed turtle remembered how she had spun around, arm blades sliding out of their sheaths as she howled in pain. He remembered how her electric blue eyes flash with anger and pain, and the way her wings hiked in anger.

The Shredder, Oroku Saki had been slain that day, but at a cost.

Their sister had been lost.

She had sliced into the Foot leader's neck, spraying his blood everywhere. She would have lived, but the Shredder took her with him. Saki had managed to bring his bladed fist down on to her head, sending blood everywhere. She had never been given the chance to scream.

The turtle had felt rage and fear fill his heart. He had not been able to catch her in time, but Leo had. Raph remembered when he had reached their side, and how realization had dawned on him the moment he realized that her body was so cold and limp.

 _Emma Hamato was gone._

When they had returned to the lair, sensei had been there, waiting. He remembered the horror that had filled the mutated rat's eyes as he laid eyes upon his daughter.

Now they sat in Donnie's lab, mourning the loss of their sister.

No, _**their life**_.

Emma had been the constant throughout their lives. Her calm when one of the turtles had had a nightmare, her love when they were hurting, both physically and mentally. Her methods of stopping their infighting, when she would grab their heads and bang them together. The way she would hug them with both her arms and wings. When she would nuzzle them with that wolf/feline muzzle of hers.

And now she was gone. Forever.

He couldn't hold it back any longer. With a scream that made his brothers and father look up in shock, Raph turned and slammed his fist into the wall, leaving spiderweb like cracks and a bloodied fist in his wake.

 _Emma was always afraid of spiders._

"Raph…" The sai wielding turtle ignored his eldest brother's voice as he raced out of the lab and into the sewers outside of the lair.

He just ran, tears streaming down his face. It was all his fault. If only he had listened to Leo, then none of this would have happened. He just had to be stubborn.

 _It was all his fault._

With a small cry, the red masked turtle collapsed against a nearby wall, sobs wracking his body as he let it all out.

"Help!"

Head snapping up fast enough to almost give him whiplash, Raph stared at the tunnel where the sound had come from. Body on automatic, Raph raced towards the sound of the cry. His body acted automatically as the green eyed turtle maneuvered through the sewers towards the cry.

What he came upon however, was something that Raph never expected.

A small platinum blonde haired girl, no older than two by her size, sat on the ground, covered in mutagen. Raph froze up as a pair of large electric blue eyes stared up at him from a small face. The girl, no, toddler, blinked up at him, taking in his appearance. Raph expected her to scream, to flinch back and be scared of him. Instead, she reached her hands out to him, making grabby motions with her tiny fists.

Raph's body acted before his mind. With quick reflexes, he scooped up the girl and pulled her into his arms.

It was then that Raph remembered that she was covered in mutagen. Freezing up, Raph stared down as the mutagen took effect, and her body changed. But it didn't change into a turtle.

She changed into something else.

Her nose and mouth pushed out into a snout. Her ears moved upwards towards the top of her head, shifting into pointed ears. Something emerged from her tail bone, revealing a white, furry tail. More white fur began to grow on her small body, and a pair of feathery wings emerged from her back.

Raphael stared down at the familiar form resting in his arms, silently believing that his eyes were deceiving him.

 _The girl looked_ _ **exactly**_ _like Emma._

Raph looked at his right hand, finally realizing that he was holding his late sister's bloody mask.

A whine drew his attention away from his sister's once snow white mask to the girl nestled in his arms. Her big blue eyes were looking up at his neon green orbs, sadness evident in them. Raph placed a small smile on his face and gently tickled the mutated girl under her chin. A tiny giggle escaped her lips as her small now-white hands gently wrapped around his large finger.

The red masked turtle chuckled as the wolf-hybrid compared her tiny five fingered hand with his large three fingered hand. His chuckling had attracted the little girl's attention, and Raph found himself looking at two bright electric blue orbs.

"What's your name, little one?" Raph asked, curious to her identity.

The girl shook her head.

"You don't have a name?" Raph was surprised. "What 'bout your parents?"

The girl shook her head again. "Nu uh."

Raph's eyes went wide. _She was an orphan!_

"Well then," Raph smiled down at the girl.m, "I guess you're gonna need one."

As the girl looked up at him curiously, Raph thought up if a name.

A smile lit up the turtle's face as a name popped up into his mind. _It would honour her._

"How 'bout… Emma."


End file.
